After I completed London-Edinburgh-London (LEL) in August 2017 I felt lost without the goals or ambitions that previously motivated me. It’s widely published how good cycling is for your well-being and mental health but I didn’t feel proud of myself, I felt ashamed of what it took to finish that ride, the depths I had to go to and how long it took my body to recover. When my body finally felt well again my mind was floating in and out of the dark and I never celebrated my achievement. I wasn’t sure what sort of cyclist I’d become, I tried to ride for the enjoyment alone but I wasn’t putting in the same effort. I was the spark, igniting ideas of fun and adventure and encouraging others to come with me. My first school report said I was good at motivating others, it was recognised in me from an early age and cycling had highlighted this but I’d left that behind somewhere.

Continue reading “The struggle and the sparkle” →